Funny Thing

"We may not have it all together, but together we have it all."

People have a misconception in my life of what "my" family should be. No one is perfect in this world and everyone should understand that, but to only point fingers and not take responsiblity for a relationship that didn't work, is a huge contradiction. I have tried. I have called. I have asked. After a while, I realized it was only one sided. I am not perfect and I have taken credit for all the messed up things I have done in my life, but what no understands is that I have to look out for MY family, MY kids. No one else. It's strange that people have a hard time grasping the reality of that. If anyone really grasped the reality of that, no one would have anything to say about me. No one would blame me. No one would talk shit and not have the decency to ask me about it. The best part of it all is when you have an outsider saying "you're family isn't going to be there for you in the end", or "that's why everyone stays away from YOU GUYS over there". The only thing I have to say to anyone who gets pregnant, and uses my sister and my nephew for his money to buy you things, You, my dear, are the last person in this world that should be judgemental, and YOU my dear, should be the last person talking about "growing up" and "being mature". When you learn how to NOT DEPEND on someone else, and where the next party is going to be, then maybe one day you will reach the level of the rest of the grown up, mature people in this world. Everyone has an opinion on what I say to people, or how I treat them. As I said in the beginning of this blog, I have tried and I was burned. Even after all the stupid bull shit comments of "I treat you like animals", or "I have no respect", or "Belle, I dont' care about you kids", or "You need to think of your sister and your brother over there", or "I always get put in the middle of everything and just want to be left alone".

I am sick of everyone actually convincing themselves that I am the only one to blame. Do whatever it is that you need to do.

The only family that has ever been there for me, is the family that has always been there for me and they will be the only ones there for me in the end.